Foodku #54

“Amazing Lays, how sweet the chip, that saved a fat-kid like meeeee… I once was lost, then I found Chicken and Waffle potato chips and now I’m found, was thin, but now, I’m happpyyyy.”… Continue reading

Foodku #53

Today is cold, misty, and gray.  It reminds me of the week I spent on the British Isles, sans the fun accents and fashionable locals.  So grab a wool blanket, cuddle up with a cuppa… Continue reading

Foodku #52

Over spring break I managed to trudge my way through the first section of Michael Pollan’s The Botany of Desire.  This is one of his pre-Omnivore’s Dilemma works, in which he examines the relationship… Continue reading

Foodku #51

So last night my main squeeze and I celebrated our second annual Amish Culture Date Night.  This entails no technology (witchcraft), no electricity (also witchcraft), no cursing (lest ye face the whip), ridiculous… Continue reading

Foodku #50

Holy. Shit.  Fifty foodku poems?  How crazy is that?  Thanks for going on such a stupid but entertaining journey with me.  Hopefully I can make the next 50 even better than the first… Continue reading

Foodku #49

Ohhhh sweet Strip District of Pittsburgh.  How my heart sings your praises from the many hilly mountaintops of Western Allegheny.  I had a fun little afternoon exploring the nooks and crannies of this… Continue reading

Foodku #48

So my main squeeze and I occasionally sell-out and buy a Food Network Magazine at the grocery store.  We aren’t proud, but there is some good shit in there and we love good… Continue reading

Foodku #47

It’s been a while since I gave you a good, dripping food porn.  So here is one sure to get you all fired up.  Try to keep it in your pants, but be… Continue reading

Foodku #46

Shout out to my mom for the delicious breakfast, full of berries and walnuts and laughter.  I blame this morbid poem on my dad, cuz we listened to his b-day Black Keys vinyl… Continue reading

Foodku #45

FUCK YEAH SUNDAAAAAYYYYYY. Wherever you are headed on this fine morning/early afternoon, take a minute to enjoy where you ARE.  A day of rest can be made that much better by taking a… Continue reading

Foodku #44

It’s the simple things that make me grateful for Saturday mornings.  Bon app y’all. . Foodku #44 Shiny green mush smeared Across a crackly landscape Avocado toast .

Foodku #43

Why is it that a bowl of soup when you are under the weather makes life a little better?  I don’t know the science and for once I don’t care.  When it’s right,… Continue reading

Foodku #42

I made some monkey bread this morning because MONKEY BREAD.  Instead of a normal, mediocre recipe, I prepared a special variation from the kitchen of your’s truly.  My “Monkey Bread with Pears, Dried… Continue reading

Foodku #41

I had some broccoli for lunch today and it was fucking perfect.  Bright green, still a little crisp, juicy, and flavor packed.  Some days it feels like Broccoli is a Bieber among vegetables… Continue reading

Foodku #40

Canyon. Pizza.  This either strikes fear/regret into your hungover heart, causes your empty gut to grumble in glee, or has no impact on you because you are a normal person who lives in… Continue reading

Foodku #39

I learned a new word yesterday: brookie.  No, this is not an annoying nickname for someone named “Brooke.”  It is a food mashup of epic dessert proportions.  To commemorate me learning something (#doesnthappenthatoften… Continue reading

Foodku #38

Last night I wanted cake.  I craved cake. I NEEDED cake. (He want that cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake).  So I made cake.  Great story right?  Shout out to Meagan… Continue reading

Foodku #37

You know that part of your brain that allows you utilize available data for logical decision making? Yeah I don’t think I have that part.  Sipping my frozen berry smoothie this morning was not fun in… Continue reading

Foodku #36

Forget Obamacare, gay NFL players, and SB 1062 in Arizona.  We have a new controversy that demands action; What is the better way to pronounce apricot?  It was brought to my attention that… Continue reading

Foodku #35

Alright, what the hell toothpaste?  Why do you always do this to me?  I forget to get my morning OJ before brushing, then I can’t enjoy the pulpy goodness for the rest of… Continue reading

Foodku #34

Corn chips.  That’s about all the introduction I have today.  I mean, it’s a food poem about chips and salsa.  What else IS there to say?  Bon app y’all. . Foodku #34 Tortilla… Continue reading

Foodku #33

Today I am off Pittsburgh to see the one and only Piano Man in concert.  I AM FREAKING OUT.  This one is dedicated to my man Billy Joel.  Way to tickle those ivories… Continue reading

Foodku #32

WARNING:  This is a food porn foodku and maaaayyy cause arousal in the faint of heart.  Have you ever have a morning where you can’t shake your libido?  Where the simplest task becomes… Continue reading

Foodku #31

When I am presented with an assorted box of donuts, I inevitably reach for the sparkly white belly button. Powdered sugar donuts just KILL me. The fluffy texture, the soft sweetness, the post… Continue reading

Foodku #30

Thirty? Thirty poems about food already?  Seems like just yesterday that I launched this series.  Time flies when you are filling the internet with insightful prose and naughty lyrics.  Over the weekend my… Continue reading

Foodku #29

There are millions of people around the globe who are awaiting the second coming of Christ.  These people must not live near a McDonalds, because Shamrock Shake season is officially upon us.  Be… Continue reading

Foodku #28

This morning I was whirled away to a tiny piece of France.  La Gourmandine Bakery  is located on Butler street in Lawrenceville, a hipster den in Pittsburgh.  It has been almost two years since… Continue reading

Foodku #27

GUYS. GUYS. HEY GUYS.  In honor of (motherfucking awful soul sucking) Valentine’s Day, I made my foodku rhyme an extra bunch today.  This one is dedicated to one of the worst candies of… Continue reading

Foodku #26

Um, it snowed today.  Fyi.  Didn’t know if you noticed.  I decided to say hi to the lion on my way to the library. #cliché #weare #coveredinsnow.  Bon app y’all. . Foodku #26… Continue reading

Foodku #25

I know when to admit I’ve been outperformed.  No matter how well I write, I doubt I will ever achieve the food porn perfection of Top Chef host Padma Lakshmi’s burger ad.  Well… Continue reading